my secret toast

To the sister of my heart–

Most people would be baffled by my wishes for you, but you’ll understand because our brains share a blueprint of curves, twists, and spontaneous Vaudeville theater.

Publicly, I’m sending you into married life with Hallmark platitudes for harmony, adventure, wealth, perfect hair, and a home that could be featured in a magazine.

But, just between us, I see your future a little differently.

I envision you, sitting in a messy living room, filled with books and laughter and children.

From FreePeople Blog, Sun Tea Pictures and Recipe
From FreePeople Blog, Sun Tea Pictures and Recipe

Sun-tea is brewing on your front porch, next to fresh herbs and an orange ukulele.  Your son watches the tea’s transformation with infinite questions shining in his eyes.  You could afford tea from a cafe, but you make it this way because you are free to do so.  Your son could learn about tea from a book, but he won’t because he’s like you.  He touches, and smells and listens– and all that observation builds a deep, guttural understanding of the world.

The carpet doesn’t match the couch, or the coffee table– but it is well-made, solid furniture.  It is the type of table you can climb on when you are painting clouds on the ceiling.  It is the type of couch that lulls visiting friends from around the world into the warm comfort of sleep.  It is the type of carpet that tickles your bare feet as you dance across it to television jingles.

In the future I see, your hair is lightened imperfectly, kissed by the sun.  It’s tossled, from the loving hands of family members who find peace in it.  Your skin is wrinkled from all the laughing and freckled from your days sleeping outside in your hammock. You are not model perfect, like you could be, but you shine with beauty.

The beauty that matters to people like us.

In the future I see, sometimes you fight with your husband.

He’ll be smiling inside, even in the face of your rare fits of temper, because even when raised, your voice fills any reasonable soul with joy.  It is a strong voice, a balanced voice, and one that has never been ashamed to speak up.

You two are destined to find differences and bound to make missteps, but your voice, your faith, and your family will see you through anything.

If those things aren’t enough, for whatever reason, no matter how senselessly simple the problem, you can always call on me.  My faith in you is an endless well and you can draw upon it any time you choose.

I’m supposed to wish you a future of adventure, but we both know that marriage is just a pit-stop in the course of yours– not the starting point.

Instead, I’ll wish that the landscape of your husband’s story adds wonders and dimensions to yours.

May you continue to embrace life and share your voice with the world.
May your husband lighten your hardships and expand your adventures.
May you be gifted with all the unconventional beauty you desire.

And, of course, may we always continue to find a magical tea party waiting for us where our paths intersect.


Much love to you, on your special day and forever more,


    1. Because when you read a toast like this in person, people get confused and think you wished wrinkles on someone, haha! It won’t be totally secret, though, I’ll hand it to her quietly in a card. 😀


    1. Oh I love it! You’re so kind… and poetic! 🙂 Thank you for reading, I’m glad to have met so many other people in the blogosphere, like yourself, who can follow the twists/curves of my mind! 🙂 *hugs*


    1. Sun tea is always just so pretty. Well, not always… if you leave it out there too long, it’s more like ugly science. 😀 Still, it’s always fun!


      1. Some camels go weeks without water; this one goes weeks without blogging. 😉 And you’re totally one of my faves; in fact consider yourself a… wait for it… honorary dromedary. 😀


  1. That’s the kind of toast that should be the kind everyone gives. But won’t because of the fear of wishing wrinkles- but they should anyway. She’s blessed to be your sister of the heart!


    1. Yep, there’d be “What, she thinks they’ll fight?” whispers… 🙂 Eh, everyone argues, everyone gets wrinkles… everyone’s living room is messy (… right? 😉 ), but for toasts we’re supposed to glamorize things. Thank you for reading, Jessie. I’m blessed to have her as part of my world! 🙂


  2. If more marriages started off with this realistic view of bliss, the institution would be in a much better place. Love the images of unconventional beauty. Love the wishes at the end. Love the idea of a spouse’s landscape adding dimension and wonder to his/her lover’s story.
    Wish you could have been my best-man. haha. {{{Hugs}}} kozo


    1. So true, realism never hurt a marriage, so long as it’s mixed in with a healthy amount of whimsy. 🙂

      If you ever re-new your vows, Kozo, I’m there, haha! I could totally rock a tux, 😀



    1. Oh thank you, 😀 *hugs*

      You know what this means, though, right? Everyone who “got” the toast has a mind as strange as mine… 😉 haha! 🙂


    1. That’s the only way to speak to a sister, and I can tell from your words that you know that. Your sisters (of blood and heart) are obviously lucky to have you, too! 🙂



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