❤melt : they leave

67 comments on ❤melt : they leave

buy a tea for ra

whyrarasaurs

I don’t have a scanner so the comic is hard to read, unless you click to make it bigger.

I’ll summarize it for you, though.  It’s titled:

Why Rarasaurs Make Bad Inmates

Reason One : They Talk to C/Os

It’s me waving to a C/O, and him waving back and calling me by name.

Reason Two: They Befriend Tough-Girls

It’s me, explaining to a girl on the yard why smoking is bad for her.

Reason Three: They scare easily.

It’s me, running out of a room after I accidentally flushed the toilet with my head.  It happened a lot, but in fairness– those toilets are loud.

Reason Four: They leave.

It’s me, being hugged and held tightly by my Inside Voices.

_________________________________________

I left, but Cookie doesn’t get to leave.

She made this for me before I went home.  My heart squeezed so tightly that I thought for a second I wouldn’t be able to breathe anymore.

I asked her to make a list of 25 things I could do for her from the outside.  On it, she told me to be happy.

I miss her, every day, but I try to do at least that one list item.  It was asked from an entirely honest heart.

Just be happy.

I wish the same for her.

Sisters are found in the strangest of places.

___________________________________

[updated: Cookie came home!!]

67 responses to “❤melt : they leave”

  1. litebeing Avatar

    Why aren’t you allowed to write? being happy is better, plus you can write HERE. But was just wonderin’.

    peace, lindalite

    Liked by 3 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      It’s a condition of my parole. I can’t write my girls in prison… :/

      But yes, happy is good. And writing somewhere is good. And if I can find enough people to write them so I don’t worry about it anymore… then yes, that’ll be good, too. 🙂

      Liked by 3 people

      1. litebeing Avatar

        I am intrigued by the idea of writing. I am also obsessed with OITNB. I even read the bio. I have mentioned before that I do understand , but choose not to write about why I do publicly. But want you to know I am with you in spirit. Sometimes I take on too much, which helps me put off what needs to happen ( like finding an awesome well paying job like yesterday.) Maybe once I have that job, I can consider becoming a penpal. Too bad there is no email in prison cause my handwriting really sucks. Your girls are lucky to have you. And so are we 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        1. rarasaur Avatar

          I was so very lucky to have them. They changed my whole life, and saved me.

          Even a “I may not be able to reply ever again, but I wanted to say hey” letter goes a long way, and bad handwriting– well, it just gives us something to stare at longer– so if you find yourself in possession of a stamp one day…

          As to your job– it’ll happen. I have faith! ❤

          Liked by 1 person

  2. E. Avatar
    E.

    That is the cutest comic I’ve ever seen. And she deserves all the love.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      ALL. THE. LOVE.

      She’s a teacher’s aide and she’d bring girls back homework because sometimes we work and couldn’t get it on our own. She’d tutor, and run school-errands for us. She’s the one who suggested STEM classes. She’d get Mental Floss articles and bring them to my room so we could discuss… and just…

      All the love. Yes. 🙂

      Liked by 4 people

  3. 1jaded1 Avatar

    I love #1. I would do the same and would probably get my ass kicked, because I’m not nearly as likable as you. Thud, dear.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Haha, oh, it caused all sorts of tension… but eventually, ultimately, everyone got used to it. It’s just how I am. They’re in green, and we’re not — and at the end of the day, that makes the biggest difference of our lives. But in the course of normal events, it only had to make a difference if we wanted it to.

      Thud, lovely lady. And infinite love.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Jessie Avatar

    I’m glad you were a terrible inmate. 🙂
    I’ll get something in the mail.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Cookie and I were pretty glad I was a terrible inmate, too. It made it more fun. 😉

      Thank you, Jessie. I love you.

      Like

  5. J.Gi Federizo Avatar

    You’re not allowed to WRITE them???!!!! That sucks and is unfair! I don’t understand. If they want, they can even check what you write about, as they do check out stuff people send in anyway.

    Now, as for another matter….flushing the toilet with your head?…How…????

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 1jaded1 Avatar

      I wondered…you asked.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. J.Gi Federizo Avatar

        Had to. Still don’t get it. I think my brain isn’t working….?

        Like

        1. rarasaur Avatar

          Haha! Here’s a comment copy-n-paste since I’m not sure how y’all read comments, and I wanted to explain the toilets, haha:

          The toilets look like this: — obviously that’s an extremely clean version, but yep. It is one of the main seating options in the room. I’d always sit on the toilet while chatting with the other girls. The button to flush the toilet is a few feet above it on the wall and it’s a touch-activated, non-depressable button– like an activator. Some are more sensitive than others. The ones at CiW are set to be able to flush twice in a 10 minute period, and that’s it. Anyway, sometimes, I’d sit, lean my head back– and then the toilet would start to flush… which sounds like a small airplane landing, and (convinced it was ghosts), I’d run screaming out of the room. 😀

          We had giggly times, sometimes.

          Liked by 3 people

          1. J.Gi Federizo Avatar

            I see. Thanks for the explanation. Now I know my brain is working just fine….I think…. 🙂

            Like

    2. zorbear Avatar

      It’s a natural outgrowth of our society: in order to make sure they maintain some control over you after you stop being an inmate, you have to agree not to “associate” with felons. Obviously if two or more felons get to talking together, even by mail (and it would be in “code”, you know) they MUST be planning to break the law — what else do they know? So it’s for your own good…

      Our penal system is so far back in the dark ages it’d have to invent a time machine to leap forward to catch up with the Puritans…

      Liked by 2 people

      1. J.Gi Federizo Avatar

        I actually get the why, and either Rara or her husband mentioned it before already while she was inside. But I’m thinking that since they’re gonna check the mail anyway, there won’t be any danger of “felons” exchanging codes…

        I guess we can’t even write and say, “Oh, BTW, Rara says hello!”

        Liked by 4 people

        1. zorbear Avatar

          Right — that might be a private code for “the riot starts at 9pm Saturday by the south wall”…

          What idiots…
          😯

          Liked by 1 person

        2. rarasaur Avatar

          I think the hopeful-idea is that making us go our separate ways may lessen the chances of us getting into fixes together, upon our mutual freedom. My case messes it up a bit, as does Cookie’s situation, because (a) she’s a lifer, though I hate-hate using that word in conjunction with her so I may never get a chance to be a bad influence on her in her freedom, as she may never have her freedom, and (2) My life doesn’t really have any bad influences integrated into it.

          I’ll make sure love is sent her way, though. There’s so many people in the world who want to know honest-hearted people. It shouldn’t matter where they live, right? 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  6. Multifarious meanderings Avatar

    Despite the awful surroundings, I bet you were a real ray of sunshine for everyone. Particularly if you flushed the toilet with your head… I’m flummoxed there. You are definitely one talented, awesome girl. Hugs xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Haha! The toilets look like this: toilet— obviously that’s an extremely clean version, but yep. It is one of the main seating options in the room. I’d always sit on the toilet while chatting with the other girls. The button to flush the toilet is a few feet above it on the wall and it’s a touch-activated, non-depressable button– like an activator. Some are more sensitive than others. The ones at CiW are set to be able to flush twice in a 10 minute period, and that’s it. Anyway, sometimes, I’d sit, lean my head back– and then the toilet would start to flush… which sounds like a small airplane landing, and (convinced it was ghosts), I’d run screaming out of the room. 😀

      We had giggly times, sometimes.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. zorbear Avatar

        You gotta take your giggles where you can get them sweetie!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Multifarious meanderings Avatar

        Brrr. That looks so cold! If they can put a touch-activated button, surely they could achieve the dizzy technological heights of a toilet seat? A roaring toilet, though, that’s cool. I would have thought that’d be magic for a dinogirl. Mine sings. Seriously.

        Like

  7. Paul Avatar
    Paul

    Neat post Rara. Thud.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Thank you, Paul. *hugs*

      Like

  8. Mr Tookles Avatar

    Oh I still have some stamps left for angry letters I was going to send Turd. What are the rules.. Can you send pictures? It would be so awesome if she could continue her comic and get published.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Probably not pictures… since if it gets too artsy, they can damage the letters while searching through them… but even just letters and ink doodles would be amazingly appreciated. Getting mail from other countries, even though I get mail from other countries in real life, was just AWESOME in prison. We used to sit and just stare at the stamps. Mind-blown. 🙂

      Thank you for even letting the idea simmer. I love you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. NotAPunkRocker Avatar
    NotAPunkRocker

    It’s those connections that could do the most good for everyone involved that make it so much worse when you can no longer communicate. Bleah.

    I am glad you had Cookie there for you, and you for her ❤

    Liked by 3 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      I was incredibly grateful to have Cookie. I met her through Stephanie, who was a total life-saver in a million ways. But Cookie was someone who could have so easily just blended into this world and, in a weird way, it kept me grounded here.

      For awhile, I didn’t want to come “home”, because it was “home” in quotation marks– but Cookie reminded me how much there was to love in my little subcultures, and how necessary it was to my heart.

      Connections are so valuable. I will find a way to make sure she knows she is loved.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Chatter Master Avatar

    People say ‘prison changes you’ but I think it needs to be said that Rara changed prison. I knew your light would shine and they couldn’t dim it. Sounds like ‘they’ (prison) made it brighter. 🙂

    I love this comic!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      🙂 You’d have loved Cookie! She is so open to the possibility of all good, honest, loving things… so very invested in the world that she doesn’t even get to be part of completely.

      I hope I did leave my mark on prison, if even just a tiny bit… even if it’s just someone smiling whenever they look at the toilet! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Chatter Master Avatar

        I have no doubts Rara, especially after seeing the comic. But I knew before, because of knowing you. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Lyn Avatar

    That is one fabulous cartoon. Cookie has real talent and I’m so glad you and she were able to become friends.
    Thuds and hugs xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Thank you, Lyn! Yes, so I was I… before I met her, I hadn’t run into any geeks! It was breakin’ my heart. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lyn Avatar

        And we all need some geekiness in our lives 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        1. rarasaur Avatar

          Desperately! 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  12. Beth Ann Avatar

    I think I could rustle up a stamp or two on my end and put some thoughts on paper. Anything special I should write about? Just say hey? I want to reach out to someone you love. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      You’re the very best of people, Beth Ann!! ❤

      Like

  13. yogaleigh Avatar

    Reblogged this on Not Just Sassy on the Inside and commented:
    You may have noticed, I’ve been less present than usual lately. Weird life. Now on vacation. With computer. But not getting around to blogging. You know I love to give you stuff to do, though, so I wanted to pass along this sweet post from Rara, and encourage you to write to her friend. (see bottom of post for mailing info). I’ll be around soon. Hugs, Leigh

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Love you, Leigh. Thanks for the reblog. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Alison and Don Avatar

    I think if I received that my heart would squeeze tight too. Plus she’s a talented artist!
    Sisters are wherever we find them ❤
    Alison

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Oh yes, she has a book she calls “Instagram”, haha, and she drew a WONDERFUL picture of me as a Fire Fox. ❤ Sisters are treasures!

      Liked by 2 people

  15. noelleg44 Avatar

    Rara, even in prison, your great capacity for love shone through! I am not surprised you left many sisters behind.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Thank you, Noelle. I have found a great capacity of love in almost everyone I’ve ever met. I am lucky!

      Liked by 1 person

  16. J.Gi Federizo Avatar

    Just wanna let you know I posted about this: “Why Rarasaurs Make Bad Inmates” Couldn’t find the reblog button, so…It is scheduled to be posted two hours from now 🙂

    Like

  17. A Avatar

    I’m always looking for new friends, especially pen pals… who doesn’t love getting mail?! I haven’t a clue what I’ll say, but something with come to me 🙂 If you love her I am sure I will too! You inspire me to be better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      You’re already fabulous, A, so if you’re driven to be more fabulous, that’s awesome. Cookie is a great companion for a journey such as that. She believes in people, and possibility. You’ll love her. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  18. realophile Avatar

    done. sent with love, on your behalf but with mine tagging along.

    been a long while since i put a pen to real paper. like a soul massage.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Oh how very wonderful!!! Thank you. SO much!! 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  19. pouringmyartout Avatar

    You consistently make me smile and almost cry…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      That’s because you have a big heart. ❤

      Like

  20. NancyTex Avatar

    This is so, so beautiful. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      Thank you, Nancy. I thought so, too. ❤

      Like

      1. NancyTex Avatar

        I’m so glad you found these beautiful connections in a not so beautiful place.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. rarasaur Avatar

          It’s the people that make the place, and I’m lucky enough with people to say almost everywhere I go is… beautiful! 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  21. Kir Piccini Avatar
    Kir Piccini

    I just adore you…and so does everyone else obviously for very good reasons. My mom used to tell me that I was the kind of girl that made friends with everyone. It sounds like you and I are cut from a similar cloth. XO

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rarasaur Avatar

      We both must’ve been lucky to be surrounded by friend-able people, then. 😀 Thank you. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kir Piccini Avatar
        Kir Piccini

        I like to think so…yes. xo

        Liked by 1 person

  22. Letters to prison and elephants | Mr Tookles Avatar

    […]  Ra from Rarasaur got incarcerated.  “She’s a lifer” Ra mentions in one of the comments.  Those three words. So hard to fathom. For life. Life. […]

    Like

  23. badfish Avatar

    Yeah, I can see how bad an inmate you’d make.
    how’d you get that toilet photo in your comment, eh? Can we do that?

    Like

  24. faithhopechocolate Avatar

    Love the bottom one and the “I can’t breathe!” speech bubble! Cookie sounds brilliant. I’ll try to send her a postcard, but need to find out how much it’ll cost to send a postcard to the States from the UK – it’s a while since I’ve done it and I’ve forgotten.

    Like

Rawr?