rarasaur maintenance

there be adventures

The sky is frosted with color.  It’s a beautiful sunset and all of us on Facebook have noticed it.  There’s a rainbow in the cosmos, hidden behind the clouds, peeking through in bursts.  Someone painted the sky, someone or something bigger than us.  Bigger, or infinitesimally smaller.

Let’s paint the town red.

The town is blue right now, I’d have called it “Mariner Blue” back when I designed my first website in 1998.  Now it’s called “Facebook blue”, ask anyone.

The sky is blue sometimes, but today it’s a creamy orange sorbet.  Everyone liked it.  I watched the sunset for hours, as pictures came through from the whole world, one at a time.  I’m at the end of the world, so my reality came last.

It was worth the wait.

So many things are worth waiting for, and everything else should be done right away while you can capture the moment.  The trick is knowing the difference, knowing when to paint the town red, when you should share what you capture, and when to just stay in and like things that you follow.   Sometimes, like the sky, it’s okay to just be blue.

Facebook blue.

Facebook has been a weird place for me lately.  Dave and I opened the account jointly, several years ago.  We put in my name, his birthday, our details.   When I went away, he kept posting there.

Some of the posts that come up as “Facebook Memories” are Dave’s moments.  Many are people wishing him a happy day.  One wish came from a WordPress blogger who passed away while I was away, a death I mourned, but didn’t feel entitled to write on.  I guess that I’ve mentioned it now, it’s okay to say it– Bill, you were a good man, a kind man, and your gift of readership and kindness brightened many of my hardest days. Thank you.

While I’m at it, thank you, Colleen— for letting me know of his passing.  For introducing us.  For being there for us both.  For creating connections, ripples… reactions.

Facebook has added reactions, something above and beyond a simple like.  A like means many things to many people.

I was here,
I heard you,
I listened,
I agree,
I am watching you,
I am paying attention,
I read this.

Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for being you.
You got this.
You are hilarious.

Or even, perhaps most rarely,
I am on your team.
We now share this memory.

Reactions in this town are so often a solitary act, which is my only problem with a place built on a ripple. Built on the idea that capturing is more important than experiencing, judging is more important than joining, contesting is more important than connecting, reporting is more important than rippling.

I like ripples.  I like communities.  I like people.

I didn’t take a picture of my sunset because that one was for sharing with a friend. A singular experience with a singular friend.

The choice of singularity in that instance has nothing to do with the next, and the color of our experiences matters even less than the number that captions them– but I am grateful that there was a little blue town, and a tiny bird, and an interactive photo album for me to come home to. I live here, I always say– on the internet– but when you’ve been away for a very long time, it’s comforting to have the structure of a town center to observe, the pathways of well-walked roads to traverse.

But I think I’m ready for an adventure now. A gentle one of my own choosing. I think I need the road not taken, and a bucket of red paint.

I am freeing the bird, closing the album, and walking away from the blue town for the month of March. In that time, I hope to be here more often.

Plant something in this garden I created.
Write something in this diary I made.
Live in the places of the internet not fit for tourists.

until I find what I wasn’t looking for.

I’m ready to lead myself down spiraling paths again, and even if it doesn’t work out and I get horribly lost along the way, I like that I’ve been rekindled enough to see a spark to follow.

I like that very much.




I’m taking a break from Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram through the month of March. You’ll find me here, a lot more often, and available through every other method still.

If you want to reach out– reach! I will be here. Right now, I’m slow and random, at best– but text, email, or mail. I will respond. You could call, too, but there’s a 9 in 10 chance I won’t answer. It’s not personal. I just don’t like phones.

phone: 805.910.7297
email: rawra.avis@gmail.com

ra jaini
13681 newport ave
tustin, ca 92780

What’s the longest break you’ve taken from a social media platform?


  1. I really like Facebook for a quick way to contact friends (private message). And my precious FB games, crack for my inner gamer! Otherwise it would be easy to spend less time there.

    Look forward to more posts from you here. That Bowie picture BTW is priceless ❤

    love, Linda

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love Facebook! And Instagram has quickly become my favorite way to peek into people’s lives, and twitter is just such a clean way to share words that have meant something to me– but, I do all these crazy-Virgo-calculations of my time and realized that it’s taken over my writing and reading. I think it’s time for a little cleanse while I reacquaint myself with my internet and the people I love to read. 🙂

      And I know, the Bowie picture is one of my favorite things EVER. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. cool. I would love you to visit me and read about my latest awakening post for a friend’s Ebook. when you find the time.. I am getting curious about Instagram, but afraid I will never get my head out of the clutches of the rabbit hole….

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Girl, is that the truth. FB used to take up a great deal of my “morning coffee” time. It seemed like I was wasting valuable reading and writing time. Now I’ve switched my priorities around, and FB is on the tail end. Twitter is for commercials and waiting in lines.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yep, that’s how it used to be. I’ve been leaning on social media as a crutch to keep in touch lately, a needed crutch, but I’m feeling more grounded again. Ready to come up with my own system. The way you did. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I was away from FB for almost 2 years beginning in 2008. Came back briefly in October 2010. Changed my account back to my maiden name and started over. Popped in and out briefly over the next 2 years. Back full time 2013. Rarely use twitter or other social media. I know, I’m antiquated.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love Facebook; it’s my favourite way of keeping in touch with my family and many friends. I have, just two weeks ago, lost my dearest Facebook friend, a man who I only met once but who had a great influence on me and upon many others who feared to tread the writing/publishing road. He used to ask me to ‘wait at the gate’ for him and so I would linger on Facebook far longer than I should have done at times; knowing that sometimes he was so poorly but that he would try to come, if only for a few minutes. I never wanted to deprive him of those moments. Now he is gone, I don’t linger, I come and go when I feel like it, for there are many other friends I talk to but they don’t mind if I reply late. ‘Real’ life has to be lived – not to mention writing my books, so I’m doing more of that now. If I go abroad on holiday, that’s when I break completely from social media; I don’t use my phone at all. If I holiday in this country, it’s a different matter….
    I hope you enjoy your month’s break. I have severely neglected blogland for a good while and it’s something I intend to get back to so hopefully I’ll be seeing you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! Hopefully we’ll both be buzzing around more. I’m sorry about your friend but I’m glad you had the chance to connect. That’s the greatest thing about social media, the opportunity to sprout relationships everywhere. ❤


  5. I was away from Facebook for more than a year before I finally deleted it. It was more like two years because I’d been off for a year, briefly on, and then off again before returning long enough to truly delete it. I thought I’d just have it deactivated forever so it’d still be “there,” but IG kept telling me about FB friends who’d joined … and I realized it wasn’t the same. Leaving that site in any form made me feel more at home here, which I considered a good thing. More and more, I consider it great, for reasons very much like the ones you’ve described here, especially: “Live in the places of the internet not fit for tourists” (and where your words and images belong indisputably to you).

    Also, I would have said “Tumblr,” but I wasn’t really very there to begin with.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I sister site Tumblr for no real reason, it just seems fun. I still haven’t gone back and deleted Dave from there, so I’m hesitant.

      I’m glad you found places to adventure that let you feel are enough to explore and create. I’m also very glad the internet is big v enough for all of us to walk exactly the path we need. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I really enjoyed the sunset this evening, it was so beautiful and full of hope in the difficult moment that I am having. I had no idea that it was a worldwide phenomenon 🙂
    I left Facebook in November or December 2009 and have not been back…
    As for Twitter my blog led me to reply he into that world. I am on a on and off stretch for my blog and my Twitter at the moment and hope to be back like usually soon.
    Enjoy your break!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. One of my favorite things about social media is how we all enjoy small things that might be easy to ignore as a solitary experience. Think of this– we shared a sunset, isn’t that lovely?

      Twitter is probably the friendliest– “Read this!” platform that exists and I appreciate that because I often want people to read things I’ve enjoyed. I look forward to taking a break and then going back to it full force. I have plans. 😀

      Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I took a year off of Facebook, I think in 2010. I have a Twitter account but don’t use it except to log in to various websites. I only recently started Instagram and Snapchat accounts. I have posted very few things on Instagram, and just don’t “get” Snapchat but my daughter uses it so added the account so I could see her Snapchats from her trip to Hawaii with a friend’s family.

    It will be lovely to see you on WordPress more often! xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. One of my favorite things about Instagram is simply WHAT people chose to take pictures of. Even if it’s just the same 5 things, like me, you get to build an idea of the world where they live. I enjoy that… so so many of my friends love Snapchat for the same reason, but I never even installed it, let alone tried to figure it out. Maybe if I come back super rejuvenated I’ll give it a whirl! 🙂

      I know it’s only been a few hours, and I’ll probably be twitching by day 2, but for right now, I’m very happy to have a little break. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. What’s strange about Snapchat is I think your post only stays up for 24 hours then POOF, it’s gone for the world to see anymore. That certainly seems to work for my teenage daughter, but not someone like me who forgets to check it more than once a week.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I know. It seems a lot of effort. There’s an explodingdog.com cartoon that I’m fond of, where his little stick figure says “Make something beautiful and throw it down the stairs!” and it’s what I think of when people say Snapchat. 😀

          Liked by 1 person

  8. RaRa,

    I’m the same way about sunsets or pictures of nature or birds…usually I only take a picture for one person or if I’m with someone it’s just for them (usually). It’s also pretty cool to skip the photo. I’m actually about to open a FB for the first time to promote my coming book (I used my ex-wife’s a few times – years ago). I am worried about it being a huge time suck, you blending data with Dave sounds kinda sneaky…I probably need to tailor stuff to keep it lean.


    Liked by 1 person

    1. It makes total sense, RR. The audcast that was lost today was about something a friend said about how you can talk about 23 hours in your day, but the story is in the 1 hour that you didn’t say anything about. His example related specifically to how the “1 hour” story that led to me going to prison completely shocked the people who followed by 23 hours. I started to think about the moments in those hours– blanket fort conversations and shared sunsets, and realized that I don’t share them because they are singular experiences, not because of anything planned or complex.

      I am excited for your coming book! Let me know what I can do to spread the word. I’m sure I’ll be fully plugged into the matrix by April 1. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Hurrah! Thank you, Alison. My adventures are always so close to home, but I promise a full report, I am already looking forward to the things I will find when I find myself on pathways of my making. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Follow the ripples and spiralling paths, then, and share sunsets with the people you find in the centres of the places where you end up, bucket in hand, and start connecting.

    You’ll have fun.

    I’ll be here when you get back, and will enjoy reading your exploits as you see fit to document them.

    (The longest I was without the internet (or, rather, with sporadic and patchy connection) was two AWFUL (but wonderful, in some ways) weeks on holiday with my mum, Niece, Neff, and (then) Husby. I missed my people AWFULLY and the disconnect, so enforced, was torture)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Without TOTAL internet is hard– I was going to say “I can’t do that”, but of course– I did. It’s amazing what we can do when we have to do it. I suppose I should say… I’d like to never have to do that again. So much connection happens through these wires, it’s a beautiful thing.

      Thank you for reading, Lizzi, no matter where my path meanders. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You did, and I’m awed, but I suppose you were very much living in the moment. Not good moments, all of them, but some, the ones you’ve recounted here, have been rather wonderous, in ways.

        I hope you never have to do it again, though. I can’t bear the thought – the people between these wires mean far, far too much to me to think I could cope with being cut off from them. And yet, you did that, too, with people in real, so…I suppose I just have to marvel at what the human spirit can endure, and thank you for your example 🙂


  10. I haven’t been on Facebook, the account under my real name, not the one attached to the fish, since March 16th, 2015, the day after I found out Male died. It’s too painful seeing all the pictures and the “Facebook Memories.” Maybe, on March 16, 2016, I’ll be ready again. Probably not though. I’m not sure I’ll ever be on there again to be honest.

    I wholeheartedly support taking breaks from things and adventures. Adventures are good.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Breaks are great, adventures are grand, and no one (least of all ourselves ) should hold us to heart deadlines. You’ll be ready if and when you’re ready, and that is absolutely okay. Want to get coffee sometime that week?


      1. Yeah, I don’t rush myself in this whole grief project I’ve got going on. It might take twenty years, it might only take one more, all I know is that I’m not ready yet.

        I would love to get coffee. Possibly that week, possibly another. We’ll see how it goes.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I will send you my work schedule– it gets weird in the next month, but whatever day off I have– is yours for the dibbing. I’m trying to work out a monthly girls meet up. I think you’d fit in to the existing group quite well, and I will send you those details, too. ❤


  11. Hi. I’m glad you are feeling more grounded. It will be smiletabulous to see more of you here. I’ve never had facebook or twitter, or any of the others. I haven’t been to Myspace since 2007. As much as I say that I might leave WP, I have met many wonderful people so I likely won’t.

    Your description of the sunset paints a beautiful picture in my mind. Hugs.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Smiletabulous, I love that word! 😀 And I really hope you never leave WP. We luuuuurve you so much that we’d have to track you down, and that’s just a lot of work. We’d have to train owls, and pigeons– @djmatticus would have to teach the Little Prince to basically bounty hunt, I could see it getting way out of control. Yep, better that you just stay here with your Stories family. 😀

      Love you. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I’ll miss your instagram pictures next month. Nobody in my “album” sparkles and glitters quite like you.

    I rarely take photos when I’m with people and out doing things. Part of it is that I’m a bit weenie about taking photos of people older than about 15 but most of it is because I don’t think you can really look at things through a the lens of a camera and be present with people at the same time. But then I often wish I had pictures of things I don’t. Balance, it’s such a tricky thing. (But I can take, like, five steps on my hands now, so I guess with practice we can all find some balance right?!?)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sure I’ll barrage you when I get back. 🙂 Plus, I’m going to try to do the Daily Post photo challenges again. I’ve always loved those.

      Balance is my favorite word, and the idea of taking 5 steps on your hands sounds almost as awesome as the word itself. 😀 You make balance look good, chica, in many many ways.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I don’t know that I have ever taken a total break from social media. I am on sporadically and don’t feel bad if I don’t check in. I closed my google+ account because I simply wasn’t using it. I find I am on facebook a little less these days. Tonight though.. I was totally tweeting during the Oscars and I hardly go on twitter. LOL I want to spend more time reading…it’s a goal this year. I have so much going on though…who knows if I’ll achieve it. I don’t like talking on the phone either, but sometimes I feel compelled to call. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You’re smart about it. I, on the other hand, am a binger. 🙂 I have a good phone conversation every so often that reminds me that phones aren’t so bad. Then I have a really awkward one and I go back to being wary of them. 🙂

      Since I missed your tweets, did you enjoy the Oscars?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I did. Chris Rock did a great job of highlighting the inequity and calling for action from those who can actually do something about it. He was funny, and Leo won best actor….finally. So deserved. I’m a movie buff. Hollywood is sort of a sorority and not everybody gets in.. I have been impressed lately that there have been a few movies with very strong female leads…unheard of for so long, and they have done well. Things are changing…slowly…lately movies with diverse casts and ethnic leads…also doing quite well. There’s hope. 🙂 Loved Chris Rock.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Oh, and one more thing..the highlight a woman won best documentary short for a documentary about a woman who survived an honor killing and her struggles. The leader of that country has agreed to change the law after seeing this film. A Girl in the river, the price of forgiveness. Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy it’s her second Oscar. Tears.

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Somehow, I think you always hear the important things, sweetie, but I know exactly what you mean by direction. I think I’m still looking for mine, lol. 😄

        I believe in you! You will find what you’re looking for! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  14. So late responding to this one; sorry! Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and the like are so many different things to so many different people. I know of several people who are confined to their homes with injury, illness or just plain old age.This is all they have – this has become their only interaction with the outside world. Sad as it may be. On the flip side FB, TW and INST can be voracious time-eaters, obsessions taking many peoples attention away from their families and the outside world. So I suppose we all just have to choose what it is going to be for us and then paint each in all in our own colors and hope that somehow, in the end, that it is going to be okay. 🙂


  15. So glad you’re still going to be here. I’d miss you if you went completely off the grid! ❤ For a long time I was rarely on Fbook… I'm on a bit more now – but nothing horrible. I've decided I do need to read more and get away from some of the trash TV I love. (My response is late due to those pesky kiddos, always something.) Happy Leap Day Ra!


  16. I usually meet a crowd of people while I am extroverting, and then I run for the hills and go all hermit. I have closed former Facebook accounts. I didn’t really plan on it, it just happened that way. I have friendships that hold even if we haven’t “been close” for a decade, life has is own way of giving me time-outs. We always find ways to connect. Happy Leaping Day! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Pinterest and I are on the longest and maybe most permanent break…and Tumblr. Mainly time was just taken away. We have so little time as is…my family is on FB otherwise I would quit there too.


  18. Ah, you. Such good thoughts to ponder (as I wonder as I ponder, ponder, ponder.)
    I’m a horror about checking FB and I’m not on Instagram or Twitter or Pinterest (how do these things work, she asks, trying not to sound like an old, old lady.) So me and social media? Phttt. Not so much. But maybe someday. Until then, I’ll enjoy reading your voice slightly more often on the WP.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh I love Facebook. Not as much as I love Instagram, but it’s up there. It’s my main method of connecting with people who I’d otherwise never get to see. But yep, people love complaining about Facebook. Even on Facebook. 🙂 It’s tradition! That said, I curate my Facebook a lot more than most people, unfollowing at a whim, cousin or not, so maybe that’s why I have a more fun experience there? And, of course, even these last two days have been insanely more productive… not because of the time suck so much as the re focusing. I replaced fb time with babbling on comments time, obviously. 😀 ❤


  19. You know how I see it? I was thinking about you, and your social media break, and this is what came to me.

    You are a beautiful, sweet, butterfly, and social media platforms are your gardens, and the people you know there are your flowers. You need to fly around and connect with your gardens and flowers because that’s what butterflies do, that’s what they need to survive.

    There can be other things in the gardens, too. Weeds, other creatures.

    And perhaps one of those other creatures, a bee perhaps, stung you while you were visiting one of your gardens. Not a fatal sting, not to you, but a sting none-the-less.

    So you need to retreat for a bit, heal, get strong enough so that the sting doesn’t really hurt anymore, or the bee and its stinger have left.

    That’s what I was thinking, and I wanted to share it with you.



  20. I’m supposed to take a break when we go into retreat, but given that FB emails you with what you’re missing, I resort to logging in each morning (in the bathroom, on my tablet, usually) to hoax it into thinking I’ve looked at it so I don’t get emailed.

    Technically I’m about to have 3 days offline when I go for my pre-easter retreat. I’m hoping to have reduced my number of unread blog posts before the end of tomorrow.

    Liked by 1 person


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