I wrote a loving ditty–
an epic one in fact–
but the bustle of the city
made us live it very fast.
I cut it down to nitty gritty,
and finished it at last:
“I loved him but he died without me.
And that’s that.”
The Daily Post’s photo challenge is about state of mind. I took this picture of Dave’s stuff before I gave it away–to remember. Then I shook my head at myself, wondering at my state of mind. I should have museum-documented it, perhaps, instead of putting his glasses on his buffalo and making the glove look like long strange arm. Should have, perhaps, but that’s just not how I widow.
If you’ve talked to me in person, you’ve almost certainly heard or seen something cringe-worthy in terms of its morbid whimsicality. I follow it up with the expression “Hashtag Too Soon?”
No one knows what to do when a recent widow flashes a picture of herself holding the decapitated head of her husband, from a Halloween photobooth years ago. No one knows what to say to a recent felon when she asks if they think her parole officer would be worried about such a picture. So I smile and ask- #TooSoon?
It wouldn’t have been #TooSoon for Dave. He and I often shared the same sense of humor, and always appreciated the delight the other could find in any circumstance. “Life happens,” Dave wrote in his book, “whether you like it or not. You might as well like it whenever you can.”
Dark humor was his forte, embedded in his heart and mind, and I wondered if I would have put a dead man’s glasses on a buffalo before I met him. That’s the thing about growing up with someone. You forget what you had in common and what you made in common.
Then I remembered this poem.
I wrote it before I met Dave, in a series of almost-limericks about the briskness of media and the unsentimentality of death. So I guess, I loved him and we were strange together.
And that’s that.
Do you ever do something and then think “What sort of person does that!?” Is there anyone in your life you’ve known so long that you don’t quite remember who brought what characteristics or expressions to the relationship? Would a post about all my #TooSoon moments make you smile, or hide?