& rings

If we were having coffee, I might pull a twisty tie from my pocket.  I save them for my cats, they enjoy them more than the finest cat toys.   When we’re talking, I’ll twist the twisty tie into a ring and slip it onto my finger.  There’s about a dozen different twisty tie rings  I can make without concentrating on the project.

I like rings, especially the ones that come with stories, the ones that were forged in story.

I think I’d recognize the inscription from the One Ring even in passing, even in Tengwar itself.  In another of my favorite books, this one by Lynne Reid Banks, we find that a ring we’ve been seeking has been worn as a belt by a house statue.  I always look carefully at statuettes in homes, just in case those silly things pulled any stunts before they were frozen into stone.

I even check yard gnomes, just in case.

Every so often I am asked, if I like rings so much– rings with stories– why I don’t wear my wedding ring, the answer is that we sold the originals.  We had to.

And the ring I wore after, just as a placeholder until we had time to find something again, well…

There’s a Scottish ballad, Bonny Bee Hom, and it’s about a ring that turns pale after the one who gifted is lost.

My wedding ring is pale now, so I wear another.  One that just represents the unity of Dave and myself, one that is less about our marriage, and less about our promises, and more about how we tied ourselves together.

The ampersand was our tie, and I wear it on my finger, on every finger.  I’ll shift it back and forth when we’re talking and you might wonder if it means something when I set it on my ring finger for a minute.

It doesn’t.  The story of the ring is not altered by its placement.

It is held inside the ring itself, inscribed in a language only a few can read fluently.  The story is about loss and the things that cannot fade. The story is about silly things we overlook, and how once we see it, we can never unsee it.  The ring is about fiery hells we make, and the ones we survive.

The story is like every other story, and that’s why I don’t tell it.  I just shift it on my finger, and refill my coffee, and smile as it clinks against the glass.

Cheers.

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______________________________

Is there a ring in your life that means something to you?

19 thoughts on “& rings

  1. I agree, it’s a beautifully wonderful thought!
    I have a ring that’s special – it’s in my nose. I’ve been with my husband for 23 years. Not too many years ago, I got it pierced on his birthday. It was a recommitment to doing things our way, moving forward by letting go of that which was holding us back, both individually and as a union. One of my favorite things in the world is when he kisses it.

    Thank you for sharing your ring story with us. 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My wife’s wedding ring was my grandmother’s on my father’s side. My wedding ring was my grandfather’s on my mother’s side. My ring has two inscriptions inside. Our inscription is “We Were Meant to be”. The inscription for my Grammie and Grandpa is ” Yours Always”

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I once had an idea to get a cheap wedding band and wanted to engrave skulls around the outside to represent my forever single status. I never did do that, people talked me out of it. I have no other rings, piercings or tattoos.

    I am so glad you were able to find your ring. Thinking on it now, I wish I had some trinket given to me by someone who loved me like that. What you have is truly special. ❤

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I wore my engaagement ring after he and I broke up (he didn’t want the ring back and I didn’t want any suitors).. Someone I know set me straight and now my fingers wear no rings.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. My first wedding ring was very special. It was a simple, flat gold band engraved with leaves. We had it made by a local jeweler to match one he pulled from a box of old rings. When our upstairs neighbors moved in, we became best friends with them. One day, the woman noticed that my ring was exactly like her sister’s. Turns out the sister had gone to the same jeweler we did and chosen the same ring to copy! Sadly, my marriage ended and the ring was stolen from my jewelry box when my home was robbed. I wonder who wears it now.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Before Alison (yes, the one with the heart post just before mine) and I got married we’d become very fond of a poem by William Stafford called The Way It Is:

    There’s a thread you follow. It goes among
    things that change. But it doesn’t change.
    People wonder about what you are pursuing.
    You have to explain about the thread.
    But it is hard for others to see.
    While you hold it you can’t get lost.
    Tragedies happen; people get hurt
    or die; and you suffer and get old.
    Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
    You don’t ever let go of the thread.

    So we went to a local jewellery maker, showed her the poem and asked her to make us identical gold rings with a white gold thread running through it. Fourteen years later we still have our rings and we still follow the thread wherever we go.

    Thanks for the prompt Ra ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  6. I have a braided silver pinky ring on my right hand that my husband bought me in St. Augustine when we first started dating over 20 years ago. My wedding ring from him is a special family heirloom over 100 years old (which I sadly can’t wear at the moment due to a broken finger), but my pinky ring stays on perpetually. It is a part of me.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. & *hugs* This is so special. ❤

    I no longer wear my wedding ring. I took it off when I was expecting our son because my fingers swelled so much, and I didn't take it out of my jewelry box after he was born because I was afraid of scratching him … then bad life events and it ended up being stolen or something, I never learned all the details of who stole all our stuff.

    However, I am not any less married just because I don't have my original ring. The value is in the vow, and the memory, more than the actual thing. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Always liked the green rings and yellow rings that move you to the Wood Between the Worlds, and out into the worlds, and back again.

    I had a ring but the ring was a lie, so in the end I sold it and bought perfume, which is by nature transient.

    I saw a thing the other day about a man whose wife inscribed the inside of his ring “Put it back on” 🙂

    Like

  9. I don’t have a ring, but a necklace with a story. I used to wear the charm on a pin inside the lapel of my jacket, before I nearly lost it. Then I got a chain, so everyone can see it now, if they look closely.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I hope you are well, Ra.

    Yes! There is. My Nana’s sterling silver 4-leaf clover ring. I inherited it from her. She was an endless romantic. Her husband (my grandfather) died in his 30s in a plane accident on Thanksgiving day. He was one of the pilots. They were high school sweethearts and she never re-married. Anyways, this ring was tied to a song called “September Song.” She found the ring at a yard sale. I know it is still tied to her husband, David (grandfather that I never met, but would have loved to). Her favorite place to find and fix anything damaged and needing love was from yard sales. We liked traveling the car and being out and about. It’s all romance, Ra. ❤ We are so lucky to love.

    Wishing you the absolute best!

    As for me, it's time to fill my coffee mug and get back to my 1st book making. Nana would be proud. If I get there, and even if I don't, she'd still be proud of me. She worked in a library as a clerk, and admired people who fixed books. She always wished she had that kind of craftsmanship. Meanwhile she'd fix up anything she'd find. While helping to leaf through and sort her things upon her death, I found a piece of paper inside one of her books; it said "magic." With this simple, private moment, I knew… She always believed. ❤ I knew that she and I were timeless souls connected in the web of family this lifetime, and perhaps… again.
    Ka

    Like

  11. Wonderful post. I have no rings, but I’ve always loved the symbolism of the perfect circle, and the turning cycle. There was a point in my life when I considered having a ring tattooed on my finger, but that never came to pass.

    Like

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