I didn’t tell anyone about the first date I had after Dave died, until after. I was afraid it would be an embarrassing disaster, so I made up an excuse and strolled out the door. It turns out I didn’t do anything horrible at the date. I didn’t spill a glass of wine everywhere. (I’m not sure why I’m always worried about this particular thing … Continue reading f.w.b.
In no particular order, here are 33 things that have made me smile recently Danny Maika performing Dave’s and my song in his Facebook Lives, along with so many other of my favorites The murals commissioned by my city to brighten the boarded up buildings around me. Perfectly timed for my arrival back in Long Beach. All the pharmacy folk who made my medicine pick … Continue reading List: what’s made me smile
2015 A correctional officer is microwaving popcorn, using the appliance a couple desks away. The room smells like buttered joy, pops like a treat. The sergeant barks an order, “Good grief, stop that. This woman just lost her husband. Have a little respect.” The microwave is immediately stopped and I hear the bag deflate in the silence of the room– sad leftover pops now chiming … Continue reading five acts tendered
Today, I can make myself a cup of tea from scratch. So I do. I chop the ginger on my scratched wooden cutting board, and push it to the side. My hands are always washed when I’m in the kitchen, and I washed the ginger too, but just in case, I wash everything again. Mamasaur was a nurse for awhile and every kitchen is always … Continue reading today i can
Gravity holds you in place even when you want to float free, and sometimes the hold is a hug, and sometimes the hold is a strangle. Continue reading grief stumblingstone: goodbye from space
I’m going for 30 posts anyway. I like to push myself.
At the doctor’s last week, he said I needed to stop pushing myself. That I need to do literally one thing at a time. Continue reading blogging: (b)link
In March, I started seriously thinking about writing a memoir, and this memory is what I thought would start it, because I wanted to capture the busy softness of my life before. I wanted to start it in a way that said it was more of a love story than a horror story, but horrible things definitely happen. Continue reading memoir: fore/ward/telling
When I research my symptoms, the internet tells me I am super stressed. When I trade my necklace for a tarot reading, the stranger tells me that I am incredibly stressed. In my dream, I am meeting a group of people. It’s a little windy and I am pulling on my blazer as I walk. I’m not late, but I’m not as early as I’d … Continue reading basic blues and golden deliciousness