I like to grate the frozen butter more than I like to eat the biscuits, more than I like doing most things. I like the butter most in states of least resistance, when it is content enough to forgo spitting, when it reshapes itself as easily as one would step out of a silken, pale yellow slip. Whish. I understand the butter most when it … Continue reading buttered
My roommate has interrupted the writing of this post three times already and I’ve only been writing for ten minutes. Every time he interrupts, I start a new post because the old one stops making any sense. He’s not an overly chatty person so I like to spend time with his thoughts when he wants to share them, but today I’ve felt like I have … Continue reading the roommate
Sometime yesterday I wrote to myself that today’s post would be: Like a pomegranate. After the peeling, but before the seed gets stuck between your teeth. Stay in the pop. Like most notes I leave myself, this is (quite obviously) not helpful. Try grocery shopping for a mouth couch or a freezer hug. Yesterday I had to suffocate the bathroom (deep clean) and make more … Continue reading 4 miles from the end of this post
My sleep, when it happens, is a little bit see-through. A gossamer sheet that falls over my face, ghosts me from the world, for an hour, or two, sometimes four. I tell it bedtime stories about jail, how it –(some days)– stretched to nine hours long inside. It sounds like a fable, for who has ever heard of a sleep so grown? It sounds like … Continue reading sheep dreams
Last night wasn’t the first night of un-sleep, but it was the first night I took medicine for it. Medicine that decided I needed awakeness more than it needed to do its job. I got out bed to write instead, but it was too cold, too dark. Earlier in the day, it had been too hot, too bright. Sometimes my chair is too short. Sometimes … Continue reading not out of the woods
When I can’t quite build a thought out into something solid enough for this blog, I will often post it to Instagram with the tag #LilliputianLog. The last weeks have seen a few of those posts so I thought I’d share two here for those who aren’t on the other platform. [For those who are on Instagram, and follow me at @rawra.avis : I now … Continue reading being excellent to each other
My late husband believed that everyone has a superpower. That it was so easy for us to imagine the possibility of a superhuman because the universe affirmed the possibility in tiny ways. We all know someone who can accurately guess how many jelly beans are in a jar. Someone who can pour out a perfect cup of rice without any measuring tools. Someone who can … Continue reading L4: immortalear
It’s not that I don’t want to talk to you. It’s an issue of scarcity. I have run into a shortage of words. When the phone rings now, there’s nothing but a chirping repetition in my mind. A mimicry of the noise I should be making when I am, instead, entirely composed of silence. My late husband would tell people that silence was my love … Continue reading pr\ early winter
